


New Challenges

by Baroness_Blixen



Category: The X-Files
Genre: Early MSR, F/M, Original Female Character - Freeform, mulder goes grocery shopping, txf-prompt-box
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-04
Updated: 2017-09-04
Packaged: 2018-12-23 19:01:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,111
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11996028
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Baroness_Blixen/pseuds/Baroness_Blixen
Summary: Written for the txf-prompt-box challenge on tumblr where Mulder faces the difficult task of having to go and buy tampons. Set in season one.





	New Challenges

I can do this, I can do this, Mulder repeats to himself in a whisper, as a mantra, staring at the female hygiene shelf. He can ignore the pads, thank goodness, because Scully specifically said tampons. That’s all she said, though. Go buy some tampons, Mulder. It’s his own fault, of course. That’s another thing Scully said. If you make her go to the forest on a weekend, and can’t stick to your promise that it’ll be a nice trip, she’ll send you on a tampon run once you’ve both scarcely escaped death. He’ll have to remember that for the future.

The explosions of color distract him; would Scully prefer a product in pink or purple? He checks if they have anything in burgundy. That’s a color she likes, he thinks. And it suits her. So does black. But it’s either pink or purple, which makes him think it doesn’t matter. That’s not how one chooses tampons. He touches one of the boxes nervously. Regular, it says. Is Scully a regular? How would he know. Another box says light. Well, she is tiny, he figures, so light makes sense. Maybe. His eyes continue to scan the selection: super, super plus and he is just lost. They don’t have that one, though. There’s not a size chart either. This, he thinks with a frustrated sigh, should not be this hard. Despite common belief in the bureau, Mulder has been with one or two women in the past. They rarely stick around long enough to talk about female hygiene or monthly cramps, though. He’s only lived with a woman once and Diana, not unlike his mother he realizes suddenly, with a jolt, didn’t exactly care to let him in on her thoughts, or feelings. So yes, he knows how the female body works. In theory, anyway. There has to be a way to figure this out.

“Fox, is that you?” Oh no. He doesn’t need to turn around to know who it is. In his defense, when he picked her up, they weren’t talking much. He wasn’t sober either. Mulder didn’t really hear her voice until the morning, when it was too late, and his ears already ringing.

“Marie.” He twirls around dramatically, showing her a toothy, exuberant smile that’s faker than her nails. He glances at them briefly, shudders when he remembers the scratches he had on his back for weeks. Isn’t the definition of a one-night-stand that you spend one night with them and then you never see them again? Of course, Mulder has to be the exception to the rule. As always.

“What are you doing here? It’s so good to see you!” Her voice is not just squeaky, no, it’s bubbly, it’s loud and it’s turning people’s heads. Mulder should be used to this; look, there is spooky Mulder! Right now, though, he wishes he could disappear in between these boxes of tampons.

“Uhm, shopping.” He answers lamely, making a grand gesture with his hand.

“Seems like you’re in the wrong aisle.” She snickers, seemingly coming closer and closer. It’s been well over a year since his ill-fated decision to take her home with him. It was shortly after Diana, right before Scully, and Marie had just been there. He should thank her, maybe, for curing him of his thirst for meaningless nights of passion. Though he’s beginning to think his fierce, red-headed power ball of a partner has something to do with his current blindness when it comes to other women.

“Actually, no. My…” Marie’s hand lands on his chest. Her long nails scratch against the fabric of his shirt. He is praying silently that she’ll stay away from his nipples at least. But today is not his lucky day. Mulder lets out a yelp and Marie interprets that noise as approval.

“My uhm, you know…” Damn it, he thinks. What is Scully? His partner, that’s for sure. He thinks they might be friends. She is the only person he trusts. The only person he wants to touch his nipples. Where did that thought come from? He wonders. Oh right. Marie. He takes a step back and she follows him like a moth follows the light. 

“Marie, uhm, I can’t do this.” She hears his no, lifts her head and pouts at him. “I’m here to buy tampons.” He said it. He said the word! Marie, however, stares at him unfazed. “They’re not for me.” Mulder clarifies.

“We had fun that one time, didn’t we?” He bites his lip just in time and swallows his decisive no. Instead, he nods uncertainly. “We could have more fun, Fox.”

“Uhm, no, really. I’m here to buy, you know, tampons. For my, my,” it should not be this hard; for my Scully, he thinks, but that would mean nothing to Marie, “for my partner. I’m buying tampons for my partner.” Marie lifts one perfectly plucked eyebrow at him. That reminds him so much of Scully that he almost smiles.

“Your partner.” She draws out the words carefully as if it were a new concept for her.

“My partner, yes. We uhm, work together,” hope sparkles in her eyes, “and live together.” It’s a lie, of course, but Marie doesn’t know it. To his surprise, the thought of living with Scully, of going shopping for her, even if it includes buying tampons, fills him with a sense of pride, of serenity.

“Oh,” Marie grabs a box of tampons without even looking at it, as if it were nothing at all, “I get it, Fox. That’s too bad. Really too bad. We could have had so much fun, you and I.” She runs her hand across his chest one more time before she finally walks off. He is certain that he hears a ‘lucky bitch’ before Marie leaves the aisle, and hopefully his life, for good.

Mulder returns to his other dilemma. The tampons. There is no way to decide which box to buy. So he buys them all; one light, one regular and one super. For all he knows, Scully is all three of these things. Maybe, if he asks nicely, she’ll explain it to him. In her stoic, I’m a medical doctor, Mulder voice. He loves that. Just in case he need to bribe her, he grabs two bars of expensive, Swiss chocolate before he finally makes it over to the check-out counter.

Marie is over there at one of the other counters, but she no longer has eyes for him; there’s a new man in Marie town. Good for her, Mulder thinks, proudly carrying the tampons and the chocolate, because there is a definitely a new woman in his life.


End file.
